Weight gain struggle

Clair is not gaining weight the way that she should, according to the doctors. Although she is alert, and seems to have everything else in order. I thought our nursing process is going well. But it must not be. It's makes me sad. But I may have to resort to bottlefeeding to a sure she gains which meet the gain. 

Today I am pumping and measuring exactly what I feed her. It seems when she takes a good 3 ounces, that she is not fussy and is able to enjoy being awake. This is a good thing, and I need to be thankful for that. Although, I do see this as the beginning of the end of nursing. Pumping is no fun. I want her to get the nutrients, but at the expense of the time it takes away from the rest of the family I don't think it's worth it.

To know I will never nurser baby again is a sad thing. But I need to do it best for Clair. Things rarely turn out as I envision them. At 36 I am finally starting to accept that, sometimes. Stay tuned